I'm a big kid now.

Well, it's official: I am going to graduate from college...WITH a job! I had my third and final interview with said company on Wednesday and was offered the job following the interview. I accepted immediately. I wanted them, they wanted me - perfect match for a first job.

With this new job, I get to move to Midland. Other than the oil men and women out there, I think I am one of the only ones who ASKED to move to the Tall City. There are just so many positives about moving there that it only seems right. I have spent months pondering the aspects of a job and location that are important for me to have, the quality of life I expect from a company, the company culture that would be best for me...and this fit seems right. Very right. Midland lets me be only three hours from the place I NEED to be (Marfa, y'all)...let's me be near an airport and major interstate to connect me to all the people in my life (mom, dad, brother, sister, loves from life)...still has the small city vibe without being a CITY which overwhelms me these days...grandparents living in the same city...DRY heat...west texas spirit. The list goes on so I will spare you now. Just know, this is a good thing. Incredible to be graduating from college in this economy and spirit with a job in a stable company with direction and purpose to get me into management. Let's all put on our party pants and get excited. I sure am.

Ok, that pretty much sums up this week for me! Wednesday's interview loomed ahead at the first part of the week and this second part of the week was just exciting and fun and a feeling of relief. I have a job. My hard work has paid off. I got the job I WANTED in a location I WANTED. Things are good for me...great actually.

Love to those who stay tuned!

Marfa means...ONLY THREE HOUR DRIVE!!

bicycles.

After nearly four years as a college student, there was one thing that most students do that I had never done...before today. Though I learned how to ride a bike at a very young age, I haven't done it in YEARS. I outgrew my purple speed demon years ago and just never needed to bike. Wait, that's a lie - I did in Marfa a few times because my car was broken but other than that, it's been a while. Most students at least had a bike at one point or another in college but I have always just walked to class. I figured that in the time it took to get the bike ready to go, bike to your destination, and lock it up, I might as well just walk! But, now that gas prices continue to rise and it's GORGEOUS outside, I opted to attempt this popular mode of transportation.

Though I do not live far from campus, it is still a good 15 minute ride to where all of my classes are. Not bad - but more than a short walk from my parking spot to the classroom! Today it was a little brisk out with hopes to be a beautiful day (turns out, it is!) so it seemed to be a good trial run. If I didn't do well on such a beautiful morning, I definitely wouldn't with wind or heat or rain. The elements and I don't mix well.

Aside from riding into the wind and nearly getting creamed by a lovely BMW, I loved it! How peaceful to just cruise along the neighborhood I have called home for over two years now and just breathe the fresh air, hear the sounds of a Wednesday morning, say hello to the old man standing outside his house...it was great! I can't believe it took me this long to bust out the bike and save a little gas. Plus, burning a few extra calories AND seeing my leg muscles lookin so good while peddling doesn't hurt :)

Get a bike. Save some gas. Love life.

Marfa means...even when your car is busted, you can still easily get around. So nice!

Hold on to your seats!

How has this happened? How is it that a WHOLE MONTH has passed me by since I was last here spilling my heart and mind? Honestly, I knew it had been a little while but...a whole month?? Wild. Time REALLY does fly by.

In the last month, I have been very busy. Not bad, stressful busy at all - just lots of interviewing (always a good sign), meetings, traveling for interviews (also, good sign), and livin' it up for my last few, sweet, precious weeks as a college student. I was about to say as a Red Raider but, let's be real, that would be a lie. Once a Red Raider, always a Red Raider. I may not be the biggest sports fan or know all the trivia of my school. But, one thing I do know: I love Texas Tech. I love being apart of this community for the last four years. I love the Scarlet and Black, the Matador Song, going out on Broadway with all the others who enjoy a good marg, and just being in this town. I am getting sad to leave but have found that, while we must acknowledge and be aware of our feelings, we cannot dwell on the sad parts or the big change ahead. That just get too depressing and scary. Rather, I am excited for the freshness, to meet new people, to be a big kid, to have a new norm for a while.

In the coming weeks, I have some epic experiences. Here's a quick run-down of my life and the excitement that happens between now and the end of May...:

Marfa: 6 days. Girls trip. Me and my ladies, Lauren and Missy. Marfa - please, put on your safety belt. We are ready to dominate.
Orlando: 21 days. Family time. Harry Potter world. Basking in the sun - what more could a girl ask for?
Vegas: 25 days. Need I say more?

LJT Music Festival: 10 weeks. A weekend of good music and excellent company. Lucky me.
Graduation: 13 weeks. The sweet realization that a) I am done with school...b) I am "responsible and educated"...c) a job will require my full attention for at least 45 hours a week. Whoa. Bring it!
Scotland: 14 weeks. Family trip to see our "roots." A break from the heat of Texas Summers to bundle up, drink some quality whiskey, and see the world with my padres and hermanos.

Lucky me, right? I am very blessed to have so many fun and exciting events ahead. What's going on in your life to be excited about right now? Even if it's just a yummy bowl of ice cream or a weekend to be lazy, don't forget to look forward to life.

Marfa means...a place I can always come home to.

JUMP start.

One task in life I always dread but, at times, cannot escape: jump starting a car battery.

I know, I know - this only is further evidence of my tendency to be slightly ridiculous in certain moments of life. But come on - my whole life I have been warned that, if done wrong even just slightly, you and your car will BLOW up. I am okay with dying if that is my time but...I would rather it not happen by messing up a recharge and being blown to bits! But, alas, I bet the worst that would happen is some sparks and a shock...but that's reality and, in times of peril, we forget to stick to reality.

So, Missy and I held on to our fates and went for it. Her car hadn't been driven all week - we thought it was just cold and hibernating, thus it would not start. I guess her dad was right - it really was the battery, not the below zero temperatures. Needless to say, we survived the experience. Albeit, there was much drama and laughter and anxiety throughout the ten minutes it took to restart her car.

Wouldn't it be cool if life provided us with a Jump Start option? Just plug your brain or heart or body into an active source of energy and you'll be good to go? Thing is...though we might not be able to just plug in and recharge, we do have things that act as the source of energy. Some find immediate energy in a delicious mug o' joe, a brisk walk or jog, a good movie to calm the spirit. Those are great for the short term burst of energy necessary to finish the long day ahead. But, the real "recharge" experiences take time. It took me nearly a year to really and fully recharge from life's hits. Sometimes it takes many years. But, what is necessary in all cases, is a desire to combat the lag in energy or desire and to push through to find the source of energy...to let that source take over for a while so you can just be still and let yourself be refreshed. With Missy's car, it took a few minutes of letting my battery recharge her battery. With life, it often takes time, also, to really flood your mind and spirit with the strength to keep going.

Marfa means...an oasis of refreshment and strength.

Baby, It's COLD Outside.

It is currently 11 degrees...feels like negative 10 degrees.

That is VERY cold.

Especially when you consider the fact that there is 35 mph winds...

and the back door is frozen shut.

In other words: what a great excuse to NOT do anything productive, watch multiple movies, eat delicious food, and be lazy.

Note to self: do NOT buy firewood from 7-11...do NOT get excited about a cozy fire on the morning of a snow day...do NOT attempt to build said fire when the wind outside is blowing at 35 mph. If you do these things, the smoke from the firewood will get caught in the stream of wind coming from the chimney and will smoke out your house. Then, to rid your house and lungs of all the smoke, you will have to have the front door open...when it is -11 degrees outside. And, even though you WANT the fire to just go ahead and put everyone out of misery by dying out, the opened front door will only add to the oxygen in the house which will then feed the fire...so it will never end. You see the viscous cycle this is? Fire smokes up house...front door is opened due to suffocating smoke...fresh air, though it eats up the smoke, feeds the fire and freezes said fire-builder...door must be closed due to frigid temperatures and no more smoke and big cozy fire...smoke assumes suffocation mode.

So, moral of the story: don't get excited about a cozy fire on a lazy frigid day. It will never measure up to your expectations.

Stay warm and cozy!

Marfa means...t-minus 11 days for girls' weekend :)

seeing life with a clearer view.

Taken from my archives...originally composed sometime in the Fall of 2009:

“Perhaps our eyes need to be washed by our tears once in a while, so that we can see Life with a clearer view again.” (love this quote.)

Tears are the purest THING I can think of. It is in the truest moment of emotion that one sheds tears. They are the most tangible and visual representation of life’s most true and heart-felt moments. One could say that they are the tangible created by the heart. It is in the midst of tears that we shed our emotions for others, and for ourselves, to both taste and feel. Others see when our hearts have had a moment of too much – whether that is too much happiness to contain, too much fear to avoid, too much pain to pretend not to feel. It only takes a slight second of “too much” to trigger the tears and overflow of emotion.

When a person cries, they are exhibiting emotions in a visible manner. And though tears come from an inability to contain the strength of emotion, it is a strength to allow oneself to become vulnerable to themselves and those around them. It is not easy being so vulnerable. When you cry, everyone knows something is off, abnormal if you will. Maybe you are tearful at a wedding or a birth for the happiness and sweetness of the occasion. Maybe the tears come in the midst of heartbreak or a death. Perhaps, there is just so much stress and expectation in life that you cannot help but to let it all out – assume fetal position and let the tears loose. Either way, it is not easy or comfortable to know that you are showing or feeling so much emotion, or experiencing such a real, pure moment. We all know that tears make a person vulnerable to others because it shows that the one crying is actually feeling something. In a society where life is hectic and people prefer to pretend everything is okay, it’s odd to show that, in fact, something is not okay within yourself.

We are able to see the tears on someone else and to see them fall from our own faces. Little glistening balls of salt water that represents so much more than a body’s natural reaction to things or weakness. You see, we can only hold back the tears for so long, can only avoid the moment of emotions gushing and pouring out for so long. Thus, when the emotions finally become too much to hold it, the tears have crossed physiological reasoning and become something of the heart and soul.

We can taste the saltiness of the tears as they roll from our eyes over cheekbones and onto our lips. For centuries, salt has been used as a preservative to give a longer life and durability to a substance that our bodies need and crave. Likewise, the ability to show our most private emotions occurs by shedding tears – they act to preserve the heart from too much pain, too much happiness, too much fear. It has been said that a little table salt will help to remove stains and clean furnishings around the house. Just a little dash and magic happens. Salt can be used as a flavor enhancer in the culinary world. If something needs a little extra kick or just a dash of “something else”, add salt. It puts the acids to work, brings out the reality and purity of the flavors. Perhaps tears work the same way. By letting them freely fall, the stains of hurt and unknowns, the burdens of holding in so much happiness or sadness, will be lifted from our hearts and minds. By letting them fall freely, the flavor of FEELING will kick into action. We can experience and really know the thoughts and power of our hearts when just a few tears are able to enhance and develop those emotions.

I love the feeling of a good cry. All sorts of emotions and thoughts and feelings are brought to mind and heart as the tears rise up and pour out – feelings and thoughts come about that I never even suspected where there. It’s as if the tears are the release – the tangible that man seems to rely on – that is necessary for me to truly know and feel my own emotions. My tears let me see what I am feeling as they fall onto my hands. They let me feel the touch of happiness or sadness or extreme emotion as they roll down my face. They let me taste the flavors of the experiences of life as my hurts, happiness, and fears move from the inside out.

glorious.

Yesterday in Lubbock it was 75 degrees with a light breeze.

Yesterday in Lubbock I was in my swimsuit, basking in the sun, in my backyard.

Good thing I have a high enough fence because the public might have been a) blinded by my pasty-ness and b) though I had on both halves of my bikini, one might consider me nearly topless...I just wanted to be tan all over! I did get a nice red tint...some said I was sunburned but I know my tan self better than they. Ha - I said. I knew today the red would be gone and I would be, finally, a slightly darker toned self than this time yesterday. On Friday, I went to class dressed for the 30 degrees that it was when I left...I promptly stripped down to my bra and some borrowed shorts at a friends house. I could not pass up the 73 degree sunshine and my clothes at my house were just too far away to waste time on silly things like a swimsuit when, let's be honest, a bra is not much different...just prettier due to the lace I am accustomed to.

Tuesday's weather calls for snow...how can I get a slight sun-burn one day and then three days later be expecting snow?! My emotions and psyci (spelling??) are being teased!

Yesterday, due to the fabulous weather and little responsibility I currently have, was titled "Summer Day" by some friends and I. We iced down some beer, grilled hamburgers and hot dogs, made and ate delicious dips with crunchy chips, and sat around all afternoon in the warm sun. It was a perfect day - really, perfection was accomplished. I was surrounded by some old friends, some new friends, and people that are just mutual friends. It was a healthy mixture that brought fresh conversation and new experiences. It's always good for us to surround ourselves with new people to liven things up a bit.

Ok, church time. Enjoy your Sunday and...just get excited because January is NEARLY over. Which means, this month is over...phew. Plus, we are that much closer to warm, sunny days EVERY day. love that.

Marfa means...a fun girls' weekend in less than two weeks!!!