home sweet home

As anyone who knows me would attest to, I have a loud speaking voice. It's probably about 1 or 3 decibals above a "normal" volume to speak at. I don't MEAN to be loud but it just happens. My sister says it's my need for constant attention, I think I am just deafening at a young age. In elementary school, I often got in trouble for talking - it wasnt that I was the ONLY one talking, they just didnt hear the others. So unfair! In high school, they teased me by saying i have a voice modulation disorder, or something like that... Whatever the reason, I speak loudly - supposedly people can recognize my voice from quite a good distance.

So, as you can imagine, those situations where talking is acceptable as long as it is your "inside voice", whatever the heck that means! Today I encountered such a situation. On my way home (aka to Marfa where I now sit tying away on the porch), I had some intense hunger pains. Rather than brave the sketchy McDonald's or use the nasty outside Sonic bathrooms, I sprung for some real food - Pappy's BBQ in Monahans. I dont really like to do things alone but I dont have any problem with picking up something to go and eating it in my car like a true loser. So, after having two very attractive and older men open the doors for me (sadly, they were both wearing wedding bands...), I entered the local joint. I immediately got nervous - NO ONE was talking! Wait, let me rephrase this: no one was talking above what I consider to be a whisper! It was weird! I had to order my meal in an uncomfortably quieter voice - such a foreign experience from the hustle and bustle you find in Dallas or Lubbock...or anywhere for that matter! I mean, good thing I planned on leaving from the beginning - the noise around my car was louder than the voices in that building! I did realize what the issue was: the customers were 90% men, they were all the rancher type, and they clearly had one thing and one thing only on their minds...FOOD. After a long morning on the ranch, I guess I can't blame them. But still, I had to rethink the situation: Am I really THAT used to talking at a normal level or was it just a weird place? Who knows...

So, as I drove the last 2 hours of my trip to Marfa, I had that to consider. Of course, I got tired of thinking about my flawed decibel of talking and turned on my newest book on tape: Harry Potter #5 - The Order of the Phoenix. For anyone who is unaware, I am a Harry Potter fanatic! I am now listening to the last three on tape so I can be better prepared for the upcoming movie in July. As I drove down I-20, I constantly had to turn up the volume...more than halfway of the alotted volume "dashes" appeared! So, maybe I really am deafening myself? Oh well, at least you all hear me coming.

P.S. it's fixin to rain here :)